compie's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- you better not pout, im tellin you why... hey..my weekend was..interesting. On friday i saw elf. It was really cute. haha. For lack of better word. It really was. on saturday i went to randhals. Her mom hates me. She thinks im a "bad influence". ha. that sounds faaammillliar. i dont see why though..i dunno. whatever. so anyways, we went to her schools ring dance, which was pretty fun, despite the lack of boys and the initial awkwardness of everyone there. I daannced, probably made a fool out of myself, even though they all said i was a good dancer, which was funny in itself. and i got randhal to dance! woo. so that was cool. guess that was me being the "bad influence" that i am. At the end these random gigantic black guys got in our circle, and half the girls got scared and walked away. that was funny. so anyways, after the dance we went back to randhals and i slept over. And today we went to church. church service today was a little unsettling. and it left me with something i really have to consider and come to terms with, which will be kind of hard. That is, that sin is merely disobeying god. As in, even though adam didnt really do anything wrong by our standards, he disobeyed God. this was applied to a larger scale, basically saying that you can do good things and not make it to heaven because you didnt beleive in God, or you disobeyed God (example, god tells you to plant a tree, but you decide not to and feed the hungry instead. apparently thats disobeyeing God) I dont know. It seems like it doesnt make much sense to me. But thats my "rebellion". and if my prayers that ive been praying for a long time havent been answered (the main one hasnt but i think it may be soon), it may be because i'm disobeying God. but, my problem with this is that, how do you know what God wants you to do? i mean how do you differentiate that by your natural inclinations or masochism? i have no idea. aarrgghhhhh. i dont know. i need to seriously think about this some time, or at least try to do something about it. I dont know if i should or shouldnt totally agree with that though. i have no idea. it just unsettles me to think that there are good people that ended up in the same place as horribly evil people. anyways, sorry for that extremely confusing ramble. Christmas songs make me happy. They always make me nostalgic and lovesick for whoever i like at the moment..and of course make me happy. Im sure im just a weirdo. this entry needs more cynicism. 6:51 p.m. - 2003-11-23 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
||||||
|
||||||